When it comes to typo humor, Jazzy Simmons admits she's hopelessly addicted

Not that her family minds. Typo humor gems from her collection make Jazzy a favorite guest at any family gathering. For that matter, she's often asked to speak at local PTA, Chamber of Commerce, and other functions as well.

Why? Because people in her community know she'll cite new examples at the drop of her sweat-stained cowboy hat. She's even been asked to do eulogies at a couple of funerals where the survivors of the deceased felt a lighter touch would help balance difficult emotions.

Her typo humor Top Ten lists are revised monthly. Lists? Yes, plural. She maintains a separate list for All Time Classics, Best Of The Year, and Best Of The Month. Here are her picks for the month of November, 2007.

=================================================================

Top Ten Typo Humor Entries For November 2007
Compilation Copyright 2007 by Jazzy Simmons

#10. From a wedding announcement in a weekly newspaper. Carla Janisch married Henry Niboon. The announcement as it appeared:

At 2:13 p.m on November 7, Ms. Carla Janisch became the latest member of the Baboon family.

#09. From a website promoting a major city known for its dangerous nature and fleecing of tourists. The webmaster lives in the city and loves it completely. He intended to say he didn't just live in the city.... The statement as it appeared online:

I just don't live in the city....

#08. From a church sponsored brochure for newlyweds. The pastor had set up an online blog giving advice to the prospective husband. The line was intended as a recommendation to the bride. It should have read: Let your husband-to-be study the blog, and he will surely surprise you on your wedding night. The line as it was actually printed:

Let your husband-to-be study the dog, and he will surely....

#07. In an interview, a high school football coach facing a strong opponent promised to stick to the game plan. The published version:

We will definitely stick to our lame plan, says Coach....

#06. This excerpt from a newspaper editorial may not technically be a typo but is at the very least an example of a little too much honesty:

In our day, I didn't cheat. I just kept an eye on the smart girl at the desk across the aisle. She was the one who cheated, but that was much later, on her husband.

#05. From a freeway traffic sign announcing work being done on the roadway. One suspects there might have been a mischievous sign painter involved...or one too bored with his work to pay attention:

HIGHWAY DESTRUCTION AHEAD

#04. Several of our local business owners pride themselves on creative ad campaigns. One car dealership liked the old Ginsu Knife commercial that gave us, BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! However, in his recent campaign, he could have used a proofreader. He meant to say, But Wait! There's FORD!" The actual ad:

But wait! They're BORED!

There is a rumor that his chief rival, who owns the Chevy dealership, sent him a Thanksgiving turkey after that bit of typo humor came out.

#03. Mother Nature enjoys typo humor as well, it would seem. The sign at the municipal swimming pool had long warned everyone, NO SWIMMING WITHOUT LIFEGUARD. Then came a terrific windstorm. When the pool reopened the following day, the sign had changed:

NO SWIMMING WITHOUT LIFE

Hard to argue with that one!

#02. On the marquee of a Chinese restaurant:

Take Out Full Menu
Please To Call A Head

And my pick for #1 typo humor of November '07. This one came from a Help Wanted ad seeking a Civil Engineer experienced in surveying and mapping. The ad read:

Civil Engineer wanted. Absolutely must have experience napping....

=================================================================

Publisher's note: Jazzy is not really a talker, despite her love for her ever growing collection of typo humor. I have a feeling, though, that she COULD be persuaded to share more of her Top Ten Lists if poeple send in enough requests for her to do so.

Feel free to click on Return To Publish Your Humor and send us a note...or a contribution of your own.

Thanks for reading,

Fred

Typo Humor At Jay Leno Headlines Home Return To Publish Your Humor