Recycling humor is a way of life for landfill employee Joe Valentine

My buddies and I all have a sense of recycling humor, big time. One day Al dropped by after work with his family for a meal at our house and to let our wives brag about our kids. Al told me about this website he'd found and insisted I send in one of my poems about the crazy stuff people do.

Mainly, the crazy stuff they throw away.

Our workplace is a private landfill, not County, and the boss doesn't care if we take home anything good we find in the trash. Nothing dangerous, he won't allow that, not like old hamburger or something that might make even the dog sick. But if we spot a Zebco fishing rod, like Al did last week, that's fine.

You can imagine how sharp you watch for stuff, knowing that. Some people seem to think it's disgusting, but we don't get it. Why should great, useful merchandise go to waste on a planet worried about global warming? Insane.

So far, the guys--Rhonda is a woman, but still one of the guys--the guys all agree I currently hold our This Takes The Cake Award for recycling humor...or anything else.

(To feel like playing 36 holes a day, click on a Ping!)

=================================================================

My buds and I work very hard to keep the landfill clean
Man, you should see the things that people do to avoid recycling
Al now owns two fishing rods and one fine Zebco reel
Rhonda found a Xerox copier with paper in the deal

But me, I've got the title for the coolest find of all
A pretty redhead left it when she unloaded
Her pickup here last fall

As soon as she pulled out the gate, I went to take a look
That Chevy truck had been piled high; I'd even seen a book
Which turned out to be a photo album with pictures from her life
I kind of guessed some unlucky man had come up short a wife

The rest was just the usual but for one humongous box
Which was sealed with packing tape and marked, NO BIG LOSS
Sometimes you smell a treasure before you open up the chest
If you've ever done a redhead wrong, you might just guess the rest

Inside there was a leather bag with golf clubs labeled Ping
And a note that read: To Mr. Trashman, if you open up this thing
My soon-to-be ex-husband won't need this junk tonight
His clothes are outside on the lawn, but his clubs get treated right

That was all her memo said, but that was quite enough for me
I kept watching for an angry man for one month and a week
Though my sweet wife has hair of red, golf won't hurt us, it seems
She just gave me a Country Club Membership for our Tenth Anniversary

=================================================================

Publisher's note: Joe still describes himself as both a duffer and a walking example of recycling humor. So far, he hasn't met any other landfill operators who have taken up golf.

He also admits he likes redheads. A lot.

Thanks for reading,

Fred

Recycling Humor At Al And Pat's Fun Used Humor Page Home Return To Work Humor Go To Publish Your Humor