This bit of dental humor has its roots (pun intended) in South Dakota

Who knew my wife wore dentures? If not for an episode of dental humor, I might NEVER have known. We lived in Custer, South Dakota, at the time. We'd been married for nearly a year before her tooth fell out.

Necessary explanation: This lady has long been an EX-wife. Also, she wore only an upper plate. So, is that simply a single denture? A dentist would know, surely. But who wants to go talk to a dentist? Unless, of course, you are one, or dating one, or....

Anyway, the tooth that fell out was a denture tooth. That was about the time I was getting rid of my own troublesome ivories, so there was much to learn about both dentures and dental humor.

The Tale Of The Tooth taught me quite a bit....

(To build the best possible website in any state, click on Minnesota!)

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Back in 1992, the wife I had back then
Wore upper dentures only, attracting only men
What I did not know for quite a long time
Was that she wore false teeth at all
Until one day at the breakfast table
When a top tooth took a fall

It landed right in the middle of her special breakfast plate
I mean her plate of food, not her plate of teeth
Somehow I managed to keep my face straight
Though a belly laugh was bubbling right beneath
A little application of super glue and it was all okay again
Although the process was repeated every couple of months
Though we never knew quite just when

Until one day when we were on a trip to the state of Minnesota
We were staying near the Mall of America
To let her boys spend what we'd set as their quota
She and I were having lunch at a restaurant
When suddenly she gasped and then choked
She could breathe okay but her eyes bugged out
And she said her tooth had just gone down her throat

It took a little while to get her panic level down
And convince her that the tooth would not turn her tummy green
But the real problem was the gap that showed every time she smiled
If you even know a woman, then you know just what that means
It turns out, something that I did not know
Is that customers in many a state
Are outlawed from dealing directly with a denture-maker
Thank goodness Minnesota's not at all that way

We were just about as lucky as lucky could be
Found a denture maker rather close at hand
Who made her a new tooth in just a couple of hours
Until I die I'll always owe that man
Later on she could laugh at dental humor that she had
So if you ever need a tooth to fill your quota
Please take my advice, ignore the public-hating states
And get your tail on out to Minnesota!

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Publisher's note: The poem pretty well sums it up. If you've got a humorous dental humor incident to share, though, we'd love to see it published right here--feel free to click on Return To Publish Your Humor (or just hit your Back Button), and send it our way!

Thanks for reading,

Fred

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