Cowboy poet or standup comedian?

You mean there's a difference? Ummm...not so much. Let's see, could a cowboy poet and a standup comedian possibly be fueled from the same source?

When it comes to standup comedy, if you didn't count people who were either left handed or Jewish, you wouldn't have all that many comedians left to count. Why?

Think about it. If you are born left handed, Life can be a little tougher in a right handed world. Being born Jewish certainly doesn't guarantee an easy Life, either. Nor does being a cowboy of any sort. See the parallel?

Duh.

Guess if you're into a Way of Life that can--at any moment--get you stomped, gored, snake-bit, barbed-wire-snagged, bad-weather-destitute, river-drowned, or any of a hundred other painful possibilities, you NEED a slightly twisted sense of humor to survive!

Double duh.

Thus, the Cowboy Lifestyle produces a habit of understatement so drastic that humor is an automatic result.

If a sadlle bronc rider calls a bucking horse a little rank, the animal has probably qualified for the National Finals on its ability to shed riders. Weather referred to as a little brisk may be forty below zero with seventy below wind chill factor. Like that.

But you already know all that. If you're either a fan or a cowboy poet yourself, you do. So I'll just provide a brief example of this form, and then you can decide if you'd like to join in the fun with a poem of your own.

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INSPIRATION FOR ELEVATION
Copyright 2007 by Rockfire Inc.

I grew up an athlete, high jumper in school
Setting state records, oh man was I cool
White men can't jump, but a cowboy poet can
If he grew up out West, in mountainous Mon-tan

I'm under six feet yet slam dunked the ball
I jumped over a stream, a fence or a wall
They called me a natural and wrote of my skill
In that little town they are writing still

Reporters would ask, was it my burly Dad
Did genetics account for the luck that I had
Or maybe hard work calving cows, stringing fence
Did digging post holes make my muscles so dense?

No, I admitted, it was old Rattler Hill
The snakes built me up though they gave me a chill
I never got bit, though it had to be luck
The time that old bell-worm was under the truck

It all got me started one day in the yard
At the young age of five I jumped up on the car
While a diamondback crawled between there and the house
And Mom said to stay there, don't dare to come down

One single year later, I know I was six
With my little red wagon, way out in the sticks
Heard that gray rattler, saw him up close
Jumped over that snake and was gone like a ghost

At the age of fifteen while replacing old fence
Pulled out a staple and heard that buzz then
Leaped in the air and didn't come down
Till both feet were churning and covering ground

No, it wasn't genetics, great training or luck
That gave me the strength to jump over a truck
I'd simply remember those close calls each year
This cowboy won trophies all fueled by fear!

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If you enter as a cowboy poet in the form above, here's what we'll do in return:

1. Read it very carefully and with respect.

2. If it's [clean] and [humorous], I will publish it on a special cowboy poet Contributions Page (with a Contributions button on our Home Page and elsewhere) for a minimum of three months.

3. If your creation doesn't quite fit our website, we'll let you know AND let you know why.

4. IF you'd like no-charge mentoring, I'll personally suggest possible amendments (I don't say "improvements" because often it's a matter of taste, not quality.).

5. If you choose, you amend and resubmit as many times as you like.

A point ----> about copyright: You retain all rights to the material you submit with one exception: Poetic-humor.com receives the right to publish said material on this website for a period not to exceed one year.

A point ----> about copyright: You further certify that any and all poems you submit are your original creation(s) and that you hold us harmless from any legal action should such not be the case.

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A cowboy poet is seldom at a loss for words and certainly never short of material. So, from one cowboy poet to another, feel free to submit as many poems as you like; we look forward to reading every one.

With appreciation,

Fred

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