Big rig trucking humor contribution inspired by tribute, says Gerald Schwartz

The Schwartz family has lived with big rig trucking humor for generations. Three generations, in fact. Gerald's grandfather founded SHH!, which stands for Schwartz Heavy Hauling, in 1956. As of New Year's Day, 2008, Gerald remains one of three family drivers moving the big stuff. The REALLY big stuff. How big?

Big enough that SHH! rigs don't roll by night, or without special permits and flaggers fore and aft. That means drivers like Gerald have time to open up their laptops in the evenings Which is how he found us on the Internet, doing a keyword search for big rig humor which turned up our tribute to the late Richard Jeni.

Gerald appreciates the talent Richard Jeni brought to the world of comedy; he would like our readers to know that.

He would also like to share a little of the big rig trucking humor he and his family have seen happen while hauling the heavy stuff over the years. Some of his limericks are Super-Silly...that's good, right?

(Curious how to hook up with the heavy hauler of web hosting? Click on the big rig!)

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There once was a fellow truck driver
Who grew up just watching MacGyver
He fashioned a rig
From a duck and a pig
Then escaped from a demented diver

A driver who sure was no dummy
Needed room for his great big tummy
Now his long-nosed Pete
When seen on the street
Is so big it makes Macks yell for Mummy

There once was a driver, Big Annie
Every truck stop feared her fanny
Her size was uncouth
Overflowed every booth
Her appetite needed a Nanny

A rig that was made for oil drilling
When moved made for mountain road filling
At two miles per hour
We showed our true power
When at last we submitted our billing

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Writer's note: When my Gramps started SHH!, there wasn't much thought given to the free time Heavy Hauling allows its drivers. He had a family of eight kids to support, moving the big stuff paid well, and that's all that mattered. Certainly he knew nothing about the still-in-the-future Internet.

Today is a different picture in many ways. Federal regulations are everywhere, satellite communications mean the world has shrunk to the size of a ping pong ball, and guys (and gals) like me have no excuse to avoid involvement with the planet at large. Even if only by way of big rig trucking humor.

Yet one thing, the KEY thing, has not changed in the slightest. Big rig drivers, be they male or female, are still and will always be, part of the greatest Brotherhood on Earth.

Yes, we have those among us who don't come up to par. Every profession does. So? I would not want to be part of any other work group, even so...and I appreciate the outlet here at poetic-humor.com for truckers with a sense of big rig trucking humor.

Publisher's note: I particularly like Gerald's limerick about moving the drilling rig. As a water hauler driving those back mountain roads, I occasionally had the opportunity to wait beside the road to let one of those huge drilling rigs pass by. They usually had at least two tractors, one pulling, one pushing, and watching them negotiate curves and corners was a sight to behold.

Thanks for reading,

Fred

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